(This should have been a read more but I’m high and on mobile so I’m sorry):
My self-destruct button is sensitive and still cooling. If I unexpectedly stumble? Well the sirens wail, signals flash, and we enter shut down. Conveniently, my ear muffs and blindfold are just a hop away. As my foundations collapse like a building after a fire, my mind has left the premises. Like a detective with a hot new anonymous lead, he’s swooped out before anyone noticed he clocked back in. The police department will bestow no awards or titles today. The firemen have thrown in their hats. Each citizen will carry a heavier load to lessen the blow to the economy. Grumbles about excess taxes pass between bitter coworkers during another office coffee break. Symphonies of marches across pavement suddenly become the dull scratches of dragging feet. Many of the weary-eyed, hopeless hearts know not the reason for the slumped backs of their peers that collectively drag the whole unit down. Gears grind on, albeit slowly and loudly. If we could only find some oil, maybe we could reconstruct the framework. Someday soon the button will be pressed again, but for a moment, we’ll pretend we saved the city from its looming doom. Naivety and hope are all anyone needs to start the machine up again after system remodeling.
The thing about sadness is that it never warns you that it will come back. You’ll end up with an aching heart again, minutes after laughing, and it will feel like you found someone in your house; someone who you thought had left.
ERROR: “C:/user/” is experiencing a breakdown. // r.i.d
sometimes it feels like
in my head.
does that make sense?
like something is growing over my thoughts
until everything has this cotton-soft
haze that nothing
and once one thing slips,
i start forgetting things i made
four notes trying to remember.
i get slow and
and the real me
screaming behind this silkscreen
and my body just keeps on
curetheinsanity You can shatter plates but you know somewhere inside it’s a happy little lie; and those actions and memories and feelings can’t be thrown into oblivion like glass and ceramic. Even moreso, that you’ll probably feel those things again, and do those things again although you swore you wouldn’t. You can crack whatever you please, but some things are untouchable.
You can shatter plates but you can’t erase emotions.
I need to stop getting high before bed